Comfort is a fickle mistress. She can seduce us into thinking that being with her is OK, demanding more& more of our time until we become firmly enmeshed in her clutch. Because she’s easy we may be lulled into the false sense of a meaningful relationshipwhile we end up relinquishing our soul to that unstable sweetheart. Dramatic? Not in my experience.
For many of us, as we reach the middle of our lives, it becomes harder to push ourselves to be greater. There are many reasons for this – I call it getting ‘layered up’. We’ve worked hard at our job so may lose the desire to learn more, or we may feel like we are doing ‘good enough’ or the myriad of life’s responsibilities exhausts and it’s all just so damn hard. Life layers on top of itself over the years and,as we get older, there’s the cherry on top which is “damn it,Ideserveto sit on the couch and binge watch/eat/drink/whatever after all my hard work’. But while you’ve certainly earned your comfort Darling, you may not want to live there ALL the time.
Why not? Because YOU are a shining star with great gifts to share with the world& the stuff that’s buried under the layers is where your best self lies. Perhaps you’re great with kids or money or you’re an awesome singer? Maybe you were a beast running track back in the day or had an uncanny ability to calm people down and help them in crisis? Maybe you thinkthose little things you were good ator enjoyed currently have no place in your daily life? It feels like there’s no time, it’s too hard, there’s no money for that sort of thing, you have no connections or don’t know how to start…so you remain firmly where you feel comfortable. Oh boy, this is my story too – decades of it.
For example,I love to write. I had my first (and only) book published when I was seven (Musty and the Haunted House – there were 3 existing copies, but surprisingly they were hardcover, and I still have one!!). If I leave my house without paper & pen, I feel naked. I don’t know what my own opinion is until I have written about it. Writing is something I feel I could not live without.
Also, I figured out I love to teach. I realized this a couple of different ways, such as I love to offer unasked for advice. Always a special trait – it’s amazing I have any friends left!I’m working to change this undesirable characteristic;however, it fits nicely into this parable of learning to recognize your hidden gifts…like what if I gave advice&shared thethings I’ve learned with people who actually wanted it? It’s called teaching and is something I really enjoy doing! Once I started to pay attention, I realized whenever I learn something interesting, I involuntarily shape it into a teachable concept and wonder how I can share this info with others? It is second nature to me and wasn’t until the last few years that I recognized this is what I do, ALL THE TIME. I thought it was simply a normal way of thinking. I want to write, and I want to teach simply because I love it and it’s part of who I am. So, thank you for being here with me!
So how about you? What’s the thing that might be struggling to get to the surface of your life? That certain thing that will enhance both your well-being and those around you? Bringing this stuff to light is hard work, which is why, as we age, we may stop doing it. It’s challenging because you’re required to carve out time to do something that’s not easy and may not seem worth the effort. But Sweetie you want to shine brighter as you age, not dimmer. And you CAN! But how?Here are a few tips I have found helpful to shake it up:
- Take note of what others ask you to do because sometimes that’s where your gifts lie;
- Think about something you loved to do as a kid – it might be a huge clue. Sure, you might not pursue that thing with all your heart, but it may lead you to some fun, and Baby at this stage of our life there’s gotta be some fun!
- Be of service. Helping someone else causes a fantastic shift for both you and them, and in doing so you may uncover your hidden talent. (It’s also one of the best ways to connect with others, age better and live a happier life).
- Change it up. If you are comfortably living in autopilot commit to doing a small thing differently. Change your routine, walk in a different park, call an old friend, choose a different nail color, CUT YOUR HAIR (absolutely proven to shift your life!), sign up for the class. All of this shifts your brain and increases your awareness.
Remember that age old saying, ‘life begins at the end of your comfort zone’? Old sayings tend to be true. Until next time my friend,